I apologize for not writing sooner. My life has gone from being stopped with endless time, to being quite busy as I move toward something new. Once again I am seeing that when I let go of my idea of what my life should be and follow God's lead, miracles start happening. The lesson from the Course in Miracles that I am finally starting to get is: God's Will for me is perfect happiness. Having surrendered, I am starting to feel quite happy.
It seems that one after another, doors were closed for me in California. The tutoring job that I had been promised didn't happen. I wasn't given even one student. The house I thought I could share with an ex-housemate didn't happen, as he now has a cat who wouldn't get along with Max. Everywhere I turned, I found shut doors. And if you read my last blog, I finally got a hit that I was ready to leave California. The only door that was open to me was moving to my mom's in Central Florida.
My mother is 84 years old and in good health. She has a 3-bedroom house in Florida, across the street from her sister, and a few minutes drive to the beach. She loves to garden, cook, and she loves me and the cats. And I get along really well with her. Living with my mom is easy. She has invited me to come stay with her over and over. So finally I had no choice but to say "yes, I am moving to Florida." And lo and behold, miracles started happening.
First miracle was that a friend who lives near my mom, in a beautiful house right on the beach, bought me two tickets with her miles. (I need two tickets because I have two cats that I am taking on board with me.) Then, she told me she was making a key for me, so that I could have access to her beach house. Woo hoo! Another friend offered to take me to the airport. Money started showing up--just enough for me to meet all my expenses. I thought of selling my car, but wasn't able to. Hmmm...I thought, this means that I must be coming back.
Sure enough, last week I stopped by to say hi to the mother of a friend. We started talking and it turns out she has a beautiful house in Chico that she isn't using. She said I would be the perfect house sitter. And she loves cats. So it seems to me that I will spend a nice, long vacation in Florida with my mom and then return to start a new life, free of the struggle to pay the rent.
And all of a sudden my social life is abundant. Friends here are taking me out for dinner and brunch, and even coming down from Ashland to visit me. Friends on the East Coast are planning to visit me in Florida. And I am waking up to the fact that it's time to spend time with my mom, whom I have only been seeing for a week every couple of years.
Many friends, whose mothers are no longer alive, have said to me: "You will never regret spending this time with your mother." I know in my heart this is true, but I had to be forced into it. And I am finally feeling very free, and very happy, and connected with so many friends and family.
Did I mention that my mom makes a mean spanakopitta??
God's will for me is perfect happiness. Indeed.